A brand can be a comforting symbol and guarantee of quality but it can also be a cudgel used for an attempted choke-out of your competition.
Heinz, or more corporately, Kraft/Heinz, is attempting to brutally leverage more than hundred years of their ketchup goodwill by launching a series of “Saucy Sauce” mayonnaise admixtures, baldly portmenteau’d into designations such as MAYOCUE, MAYOMUST, and the one we saw on the shelf at our local grocery store, MAYOCHUP. Get it?
In case you don’t, the Heinz website will show you:
See? You can make your own MAYOCHUP. Didn’t you realize you might want to DIY a combo of ketchup and mayonnaise? Of course you didn’t, but you went all reverse-Marie Kondo in your refrigerator and added that squeezer of MAYOCHUP, and jammed another condiment into the rack on your fridge door, right?
What the heck are you even doing making mayonnaise, Heinz? Nobody ever took your “57 Varieties” slogan seriously, it was only about pickles in the first place, and meanwhile you made your name on one variety: ketchup. Keep your horse in your own ever-proliferating-ketchups stall; it’s fine if you want to get all heirloom-tomato on your sauce tomate, just don’t start diluting the meaning of HEINZ.
HEINZ Mayo and HEINZ mustard and HEINZ mayo-mustard is going to dislodge the consumer from identifying HEINZ with the idea of your perfectly good pickles, and more importantly, the Core Meaning of HEINZ, ketchup!
Meanwhile, the MAYOMUST product is an abomination. Heinz is fronting like they invented the idea, but Dijonnaise has been around for years. It’s a crazy mix-’em-up of dijon mustard and mayonnaise!
Mustard-mayonnaise Durkee Sauce was invented 12 years before Heinz was even a tickle in Henry John Heinz’s pickle. Stop inventing stuff that’s already been invented, Heinz!
