Remember the buildup to Black Friday, back when they invented Black Friday? Now the contents of the Promotions email tab have been frenzied for days. November 17—the Saturday before Thanksgiving—I clicked over and Lands’ End showed up with an “EMAIL EXCLUSIVE Flash sale!” Fifty percent off outerwear! Forty percent off regular items! The younger kid had outgrown his last waterproof jacket, maybe it was time for a new one. Tonight only! I was opening tabs and missing out on the right size in low inventory and the clock was running, and then I realized—nobody’s blowing out their Black Friday offers before Black Friday. L.L.Bean was proclaiming “LAST DAY TO SAVE” 20 percent off home goods. If that was the last day to save 20 percent at L.L. Bean between then and Christmas, then, well, somebody’s missing an opportunity, but it’s probably more Bean that it is me. The music store was offering “an advance copy of our upcoming Black Friday deals” if I wrote back or called to ask for them. Why would I be in a hurry? It’s an early Thanksgiving this year, even. There’ve been 10 dozen more Promotions messages since then. “BLACK FRIDAY IS ON”…”Black Friday Doorbusters are here”…”BLACK FRIDAY DEALS ARE HERE!”…”Black Friday Deals Week.” I let the clock run out on Lands’ End’s 50 percent off outerwear / 40 percent regular offer and the next day was 50 percent off every full-priced item, all departments. “Cyber Week Starts Now,” it said, on the Sunday before the Monday before Cyber Monday. Cyber Week has two Mondays in it. There is a War on Black Friday, and Black Friday is to blame.
